The Lonely Mummy

Posted on Wednesday 3 July 2013 and filed under , , , , . You can follow any responses to this entry through theRSS 2.0 . You can leave a response or trackback to this entry from your site

Every mother faces lonely mummy moments in life, whether with her first-born, second or last numbered child.

Wait, how can that be?

Kids are the loudest most entertaining company you can get and they can surely keep you a busy bee going for hours!

Yes… But the truth is, despite the roses, rainbows and sunshine, being a mum can get you feeling a little down sometimes.

Though there is nothing more precious than spending time with your little one, bonding and exploring the world together, it can be inevitable for the stay-at-home mum to miss adult conversations, freedom to spontaneously go out and be with friends for shopping, dinners, movie dates or simply a peaceful time out alone. It can get pretty lonely talking to your baby or toddler who often cannot talk back.

So what can lonely mummy do to tackle these feelings?

Strike a Balance
If you are blessed enough to stay at home with your children, this does not mean you are confined to only toys and the walls of your home.

You may not have to go to an office anymore, but you can still step out.

Establish a routine for you and the kids by arranging activities every day (be it inside or outside). Get into a variety of things and break the week up as this will help keep you motivated.

Outdoors Time
Keeping active at least once a day is highly important for a mum and her children. Take a stroll at the park or head to the playground and the beach (weather permitting). Just remember to keep moving. The fresh air will be good for you and the kids, and releasing some happy endorphins can fight the blue thoughts.

Support is key!
Search around for mummy support groups, and kids playgroups. Here you can find other women in the same situation as you with their grunts and comical stories. The last thing a lonely mum needs to feel is overwhelmed, unhappy, and that she’s going solo.

Meet up at least once a week with other fellow mothers to get the adult conversation you may be craving. Vent your stress, and share your parenting tips- who knows one of you might just have the right calming magic!

Other times, you might like to arrange monthly dates with friends where you talk about everything under the sun except your kids! This may be hard, but possibly fun.

Healthy Separation

As much as devoted mothers hate to accept that they need their own time away from their kids to breathe and to feel normal, it has to be done.

Looking after a child can be very tiring and challenging. It is only fair and deserving that women get their breaks- whether it be to go out or to sleep in.

Try to get your own time and pass your mummy duty to a babysitter or your husband. Establish a support system and have people you can rely on for help.

Taking short breaks from the kids can take you a long way in coping with your sadness of feeling lonely. The absence and distance will also trick you to miss and appreciate them, and bring you back as a stronger woman.

Bye Bye Blues 
Everyone feels glum sometimes. Mothers feel it extra because they’re so tired and busy caring for someone else, namely their child, and can’t attend to their own feelings and wishes.

You may want to sleep all day, or enjoy a longer shower, but your child needs to be fed, rocked to sleep, played with, or taken to school.

That is the reality.

End your loneliness by realizing that your kids will grow up so fast, and the day will come that your little ones will no longer need constant attention.

Stay-at-home mummies are so fortunate to be with their kids. Use the time to your advantage and remember how magnificent your job actually is. Cherish the precious moments watching your kids eat, sleep, play, talk, and learn, and hopefully your perspective will change and you’ll cheer up.

Author: Rugaiyah Alkaff

Copyright © 2013 Sandhya Maarga Holistic Living Resources
Holistic Living Annex (JULY 2013)

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